Eighteen - Unfinished and Seeking#
date: July 11, 2022
slug: 1
status: Published
tags: Essays
type: Post
When I was a child, I skimmed through the I Ching, and now I've forgotten its content entirely, though I still vaguely remember the names of each hexagram.
The I Ching begins with the hexagrams of Qian and Kun, but the last hexagram is "Unfinished."
What does "Unfinished" mean? Confucius wrote in the "Commentary on the Hexagrams," "Things cannot be exhausted, hence it is received as Unfinished." When the sixty-four hexagrams of the I Ching reach the hexagram of Jiji, Qian and Kun may almost cease. The contradiction seems to disappear, and the struggle has already stopped—yet dialectical materialism tells us that contradictions never disappear; "things cannot be exhausted," thus after Jiji, there will still be Unfinished, and the changes in the contradictions of things are inexhaustible.
Once the clock strikes twelve tonight, it signifies that according to the Chinese yin-yang calendar, I will officially enter the world of adults.
Yes, I am eighteen years old, and I am an adult.
Being an adult means I have officially ended the youthfulness and anxiety of my teenage years, even if I still feel a pang in my heart;
Being an adult means I must officially take on the responsibilities that a citizen should bear, even if I am not yet independent;
Being an adult means I seem to no longer be a child; that long-desired "I have grown up" from my childhood now seems to be rushing towards me, pulling me forward to face this world.
Time passes like this, day and night without rest.
How fortunate to be in this world, today marks eighteen years.
When I read, I often wonder: how should we, as "modern people," face the crisis of modernity?
What is the crisis of modernity?
What is modernity?
Modernity is "the waves of the Yangtze River push the waves in front, a new generation replaces the old," it is about reform and innovation. Now, too many lifestyles are either being overturned or are in the process of being overturned. Of course, optimists call it "iteration." Amidst the frequent sounds of iteration, it seems that all industries will quickly turn into traditional industries; failing to keep up with the times is the most fatal challenge of this era, and many things as solid as the Great Wall have quickly vanished. It seems that in the blink of an eye, the old clichés I knew have turned into the tears of the era, and the latest explosive news and knowledge are being rushed into my brain by big data and the internet.
"Colorful flowers gradually want to confuse the eye" is the most accurate portrayal of this rapidly developing society.
As the values of modernity penetrate deeply into our hearts, liberalism and egalitarianism are also gradually seeping into our consciousness. However, liberalism and egalitarianism require pluralism, and pluralism and relativism are twin siblings—relativism is the spiritual soil where the crisis of modernity lurks. Everything is in flux, everything can be deconstructed at will. Standards are no longer standards, and virtues are no longer virtues. Everything is relative: truth, value, beauty and ugliness, good and bad, right and wrong...
This mode of thinking is not necessarily wrong, but it is certainly not entirely correct. Allan Bloom sharply pointed out: "As a result, the differences between people and cultures seem to have disappeared, and the opposition to discrimination has gained a more solid basis. However, on the other hand, the motivation for humanity to pursue nobility and excellent qualities has also disappeared. Even if these qualities are found, there is no need to extol them."
Whether in the micro-narrative of changes around us or in the grand narrative of national eras, the wheels of time are rolling forward. In the midst of speed and change, between rapid growth and rapid decay, I firmly believe that there will always be a steadfast core in this society, which, after the tempering of time, still emits an unchanging brilliance. This core is manifested in the efforts of younger students striving for the future, in the dedication of teachers who bring light to mountain villages, and in every one of you and me who does not give up. This core is our pursuit of fairness and justice, our expectations for benevolence and righteousness, and our adherence to a moral law that better aligns with human nature and the direction of human development.
In the seventeen years that have passed, the passage of time and my own growth are changes, while my love for reading and computers, and my pursuit of beautiful things remain unchanged.
After the college entrance examination, there was a period when I felt particularly anxious—big data algorithms are indeed too powerful, with various videos and articles that I already like or might like competing to appear on the homepages of various apps and websites. The distance my thumb travels on the small screen of my phone may exceed the distance my feet have walked. I spend a lot of time on these things every day, and the result not only does little to help my growth but may also create an information cocoon, making me even more narrow-minded.
Understanding is based on reality, but reality does not always present itself automatically.
Realizing this, I began to gradually narrow my channels for information acquisition, strictly controlling the influence of big data, merging the vast majority of information sources into one place, and rejecting algorithmic recommendations. I focused on improving myself in my field and often asked "Is it true?" and "Why?" when facing various events.
The longer I surf the internet, the more I want to reopen books, not to seek truth, but for inner peace. The information the internet has given me has already led to severe overload; serious reading is what my heart desires. As a grain of sand in this era, I am sometimes powerful, but more often powerless, yet I have no choice but to read, think, and then do my best to live this life well.
In this change and permanence, I have stumbled through seventeen years and am about to embark on a new journey. Just as I often say to my good friends: "Once a move is made, there is no regret; the choice itself is a step forward." Along the way, although there are many regrets, there is even more joy, and many people I love and who love me. Human choices are difficult to navigate smoothly, but I seek not to betray my heart. Summarizing the experiences of seventeen years, I aim to correct my shortcomings, maintain my strengths, never give up, and continue to move forward with optimism.
I've rambled on a lot; seventeen years is so long, and the future is also so long, it's hard to finish a post; seventeen years is very short, and life seems short as well, a post seems more than enough.
Regardless of anything,
Happy 18th birthday to myself!